They took away my glasses, my flashlight and my watch
All they left me was the silver fox to cover up my crotch.
So I staggered through the dark, hoping I could find my clan
But instead I stumbled on another naked howling man.
I asked was he a Cave Bear, and could he help me please?
He said he was a Stag and we were mortal enemies.
He gored me with his antlers, I slashed him with my paws,
I grabbed him by the neck and held him in my mighty jaws.
Then I dropped him on the ground, and gave a mighty roar
For I heard a lusty chorus chanting hymns in praise of Thor.
There were half a dozen cave bears hunkered down upon a rock
And a chicken wrapped in plastic from the Safeway down the block.
We planned a rite of passage so we could be born anew
But we found we all were circumcised, so what else could we do?
We set up a peyote rite, and brother, it was deep.
I could tell you more about it if I hadn’t gone to sleep.
Now the weekend’s over and I’m on the freeway home.
Along with my bold comrades no longer can I roam.
No more wading in the river, or leaping from the rocks
And there’s mud and blood and chicken grease on Martha’s silver fox.
With me rantin-toorin-addie-fol-da-di-do.
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